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Saturday, October 26, 2013

My New Job

I really need to get better at posting about these things as they happen, but...

I GOT A NEW JOB!!!!!!

AND I LOVE IT!!!!!!

I'm working at a comedy club, and while it's not the part of the entertainment business that I grew up in, it's at least entertainment. If you haven't heard of The Stress Factory, it's an awesome comedy club in New Brunswick, and we get some seriously awesome comedians in here. Pretty much all of my favorites have performed here at one time or another.

I had to take a slight pay cut from what I was making at my other job, but both AJ and I felt that my sanity was worth it. And now that my schedule has shifted to Tuesday through Saturday, I have Mondays all to myself to go grocery shopping, or do laundry, or cook, or anything else that I was too tired to do on Saturdays. Basically, it's my day to be Little Suzie Homemaker :)

My work days basically consist of answering the phones and selling tickets, updating the club's website, running their social media sites, send out email blasts, and helping to get the club ready for the comics. And while that may sound easy, it isn't always. During the day I'm the only one there to answer a multi line phone system, and to answer the door for deliveries, and to update the Facebook and Twitter account every hour. Earlier in the week, it's not too crazy, and I have some time to do stuff like blog, but on a day where we have a show that night, it can get nuts!

And it doesn't help that I'm not naturally that funny. You try posting something funny on Twitter every hour and see how fast you run out of ideas. And I'll find things that I think are funny, but then I sit there for about five minutes debating whether the majority of our audience will think it's funny.

It's interesting, because looking back now, I really did like my job at the Y. It was cool to be the supervisor and to be trusted with that much responsibility and left alone to do my work. And I had time to read or write or do whatever while nothing was going on.  I thought that I hated it because what I wanted was a 9-5 office job where I got to wear skirts and pantyhose and be professional. In reality, it really was just the people that populated that particular Y that ruined it for me. I'm too much of a creative person to work in a strictly corporate environment where I'm expected to act like a robot, especially a medical one. And being an actor, I'm too emotional a person to deal with a work environment where anything that goes wrong gets blamed on me or bosses take out their frustrations on me.

I feel like I've found a job with the perfect balance of being full time but in a relaxed environment. A job where I have a lot of freedom during the day, but still have duties to perform. Plus, I have the bonus of being one of the first to know when a comedian's coming in and get free tickets :) I've been here three weeks now, and I love it. I got an email the other day from the girl who took over for me at QDx (I told her that I have no cellphone service here, but I have wifi, so if she has any questions she could email me) that started out with "Hi Corinne, you lucky girl." All I can say is that I have absolutely NO regrets about leaving there.

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Double Standards and Disney Princesses


I have always been a defender of the Disney Princesses, and Disney in general. Disney is a big deal for me. But it’s really about more than loving the movies; it’s about respecting them for what they are and what they taught me growing up.

The Disney Princesses get a lot of harsh criticism about everything from the designs of their bodies to their personalities, but the thing that they’re criticized for most often is the supposed negative messages they give to little girls. People see the first three (Snow White, Cinderella, and Sleeping Beauty) and instantly think, “These movies tell girls that all they have to do is wait around for a man to come and save them.” That’s an obvious view to take if you don’t look any deeper, but more on that in another post. There are two Princess movies specifically which came out back to back that get a HUGE amount of criticism for their heroines’ actions; The Little Mermaid and Beauty and the Beast. I’ll look at each one individually to start. (And just so you know, this criticism really does upset me. My face was hot by the time I was half way through writing this.)


The Little Mermaid

So, let’s set up the story first. A young mermaid named Ariel who is obsessed with human culture wishes that she could become a human herself. She’s constantly going up to the surface to watch them and collecting their artifacts, even though this gets her in trouble. One day, she sees a ship passing overhead and goes go up to the surface to check it out. On the deck, she sees and instantly falls for a handsome human prince named Eric. When a storm suddenly comes up and Eric is thrown overboard, she saves him from drowning and returns home, wishing now more than ever that she could be a human so that they could be together. Her somewhat over protective father finds out about her hoard of human things and after trying again to dissuade her fascination with humans. After she blurts out that she’s in love with the human prince, he decides that the only way to get through to her is to destroy all of her collection, including the life-sized statue of the prince that also fell off of Eric’s ship, leaving her devastated. An evil sea witch named Ursula uses Ariel’s emotional state to trick her into trading her voice for the ability to be a human for three days. If she can get the prince to fall in love with her and kiss her by the third day, she’ll remain a human. If not, she’ll turn back into a mermaid. Ursula obviously has ulterior motives for doing this, but we’ll skip that for now. So Ariel agrees, gets turned into a mute human, and ends up being taken back to the prince’s castle when he finds her in distress on a beach. During the course of two days, it’s pretty obvious that Prince Eric is falling for her, but he is stubbornly intent on finding the girl who rescued him and sang to him (which he obviously thinks can’t be Ariel, because she can’t talk). But just when he’s decided to give up the search and let himself fall in love with her, Ursula decides to stop Ariel from getting that oh so important kiss by transforming herself into a human and using Ariel’s voice to magically entice Prince Eric into marrying her. Hilarious hijinks ensue when Ariel’s aquatic friends stop the wedding, Ariel gets her voice back, Ursula’s spell on Eric is broken, and he realizes that Ariel really was the girl he was searching for all along. But unfortunately, it’s too late, and Ariel turns back into a mermaid and is taken back under the sea by Ursula for a final battle for control over the ocean. Ariel and Eric take turns saving each other, the good guys win, and Ariel’s father, sees that she really does love Eric and that maybe humans aren’t really that bad. He uses his power to turn her back into a human, and the two live happily ever after.

Now, there are a lot of great lessons one can take away from this movie; There’s the typical good triumphs over evil and love conquers all, but what about other, more subtle messages, like when you stop looking for who you think is the perfect person for you, you might see that you already have that perfect person standing right in front of you? Or how about don’t be afraid to go after what you truly want?

But what message do the haters take away from this movie?



Really? THAT’S message you see?

First of all, let me clear something up here. Ariel wanted to be a human BEFORE she even knew that Prince Eric existed. She sings a whole damn song about how much she wants to be a human and have human experiences like walking and dancing and wants to be “Part of Your World”. THEN she sees Eric and falls in love with him, and that’s the extra umph that Ursula needs to get her to agree to make the deal. Secondly, Eric fell in love with her as a human, yes, but he never knew she was a mermaid before that. He only saw her head and upper body, not her tail. He thought she was a human from the beginning. But when he watched her turn into a mermaid right before his eyes, he didn’t go “OMG GROSS WHAT WAS THAT HALF FISH THING I ALMOST KISSED?” He said, “I lost her once, I’m not going to lose her again,” and went into the water after her to save her and her father from Ursula (how he held his breath that long I’ll never know). And then afterwards, he woke up on the beach to her as a human and they were married. He never said to her, “Girl, I think you’re hot, but only from the waist up. If you want to be with me, you’re going to have to do something about that tail.” He didn’t ask her to change for him. You never know, maybe he was ready to be a merman for her but she beat him to the punch.


Let’s move on to the second movie.

Beauty and the Beast

Again, we’ll set up the story: We get an exposition about a young prince who was turned into a beast for being “spoiled, selfish, and unkind.” This spell was cast on the entire castle and everyone who lived there, and the only way that the spell could be broken is if the prince could learn to love someone other than himself, and get her to love him in return, within a time limit. Fast-forward to present day, and we meet a young woman named Belle. She lives in a small town where everyone thinks she’s weird because she reads all the time and doesn’t think that the town hottie Gaston is all that great, because he’s an egotistical jerk. One day, her father, who is apparently her only living relative, gets lost in the woods and stumbles upon the enchanted castle, and the Beast promptly puts him in his dungeon for trespassing. When the family horse returns home without her father, Belle decides to go looking for him, and the horse brings her to the castle. She goes in, and even after seeing how terrifying this beast is, she willingly takes her father’s place as the Beast’s prisoner so that her older, sickly father can live. The Beast is obviously affected by her selflessness, but doesn’t really know how to respond to it, other than by not locking her in the dungeon and giving her a room and free reign of the palace, with one exception; she can’t go into the west wing, which is apparently his private sulking grounds. Belle breaks this exception, and he (to put it mildly) loses his temper with her. She flees from the castle, and he realizes that he’s just blown it with probably the one person who he could get to break the spell. He decides to go after her, which is a good thing, because when he finds her, she’s about to be ripped apart by wolves. He saves her, getting very badly hurt in the process. When he falls over unconscious, Bell starts to get back on her horse and head for home, but realizes that this guy just saved her life, she can’t leave him there to die in the snow. So she somehow gets him up on her horse and takes him back to the castle. She starts nursing him back to health, and they get into a fight about who’s fault his injuries were. Now the Beast has never been called out on his shit before, so he’s kind of taken aback by it, but then starts to soften up. They start spending more time together, and she notices that he’s changing, becoming more gentle and acting less like an animal and more like a person. He realizes that he’s falling in love with her, and that he’s never felt this way about anyone before and doesn’t know what to do. So he gives her the castle’s library, knowing how much she loves books. After a night of dinner and dancing, the Beast asks Bell if she’s happy there with him. She says yes, but that she misses her father. He shows her is magic mirror, which shows Belle her father, lost in the woods yet again after attempting to come back and rescue her. The Beast tells her to go and find her father, that’s she’s no longer his prisoner (although it’s clear that he hasn’t thought of her as that for a while). She thanks him and leaves, taking the mirror with her so that she can remember him. Watching Belle leave, the enchanted objects in the castle realize that he’s finally learned what it means to love someone. After Belle returns home with her father, incites a mob riot to go kill the Beast, and breaks out of the basement she was locked in, she returns to the castle to stop Gaston from killing the Beast. Once he sees that she came back for him, the Beast loses his ‘just go on and kill me’ attitude and starts fighting back. He gains the upper hand, but rather than following his animal instincts and dropping Gaston off of the side of the castle, he puts him down and tells him to get lost. But just as the Beast gets to Belle, Gaston stabs him, and ends up falling off of the castle anyway. The Beast apparently dies in Belle’s arms, but she tells him that she loves him just before the spell’s timer runs out, and he’s transformed back into his human self, along with everyone else in the castle, and they live happily ever after.

So, what are the lessons we can take away from this movie? Again, good triumphs over evil and love conquers all? Sometimes you have to really look to see the good in people? Don’t judge a book by its cover? If you let down the walls you’ve built to keep people away, you might let the love of your life in? Don’t be afraid to be different? Don’t be a selfish ass hole or an enchantress will make you learn your lesson the hard way?

Nope.

First of all, Stockholm syndrome is a form of traumatic bonding, “which describes ‘strong emotional ties that develop between two persons where one person intermittently harasses, beats, threatens, abuses, or intimidates the other.’ One commonly used hypothesis to explain the effect of Stockholm syndrome is based on Freudian theory. It suggests that the bonding is the individual’s response to trauma in becoming a victim. Identifying with the aggressor is one way that the ego defends itself. When a victim believes the same values as the aggressor, they cease to be a threat” (source: Wikipedia.org). I don’t really see Belle going through that much trauma or abuse, and I don’t see the Beast as an aggressor. She wasn’t violently kidnapped or forced to stay in the palace, she willingly gave up her freedom to take her father’s place. And yes he freaked out on her when she went into the West Wing, but he didn’t do anything more than yell at her and scare her. I really don’t think those are grounds for a Stockholm Syndrome diagnosis for Belle. And okay, I get it that it’s a little awkward that she starts out their relationship as his prisoner. But she really stops being a prisoner the first time she leaves the castle. After he saves her, she almost gets on her horse and books it again. It’s her compassion that makes her stop and think about what it would mean to leave him bleeding and unconscious in a snow storm. And she could have plopped him back on the bed and said, “Well, I’ve done my good deed, I’m peacing out before he gets up”, but she starts nursing him back to health because she is a good person and wants to thank him for saving her life, and THEN begins to fall in love with him when she notices the change in him.

And look at the Beast. Here’s a man who was turned into a “hideous beast” when he was eleven years old (Yes, eleven. Do the math people. The rose will bloom until he’s 21, and Lumiere sings “Ten years we’ve been rusting”) for being selfish and mean. And we never hear any mention of his parents, so he’s either an orphan, or they were taken away from him as part of the curse. Can you imagine all that as an eleven-year-old? I don’t blame him for being angry and bitter!  Then Belle comes along and she is the first person who isn’t a servant and afraid of him to treat him with any sort of kindness in ten years, if not more. Because of her kindness and compassion, he falls in love with her, and becomes a better person. And Belle falls in love with him because she recognizes that he’s changing and making an effort for her, and that under that terrifying exterior and bad temper he truly has a good soul.

(The other argument against this movie that I’ve heard is that Belle doesn’t know about the curse, and falls in love with a beast, therefore it’s a movie about beastiality. And to that argument I say fuck you, stop trying to ruin childhood for everyone. She’s in a castle were almost every inanimate object talks, ruled over by a beast who talks, wears clothing, and has a portrait of a human in his west wing, where she’s not allowed to go. She’s a smart girl, and I think she can put two and two together.)


We’re always told that relationships are an equal partnership, and that they require compromise. So in the first movie, we have a girl who makes a compromise to be with the man she loves. And it’s not like she gave up a lifelong dream because her new boyfriend didn’t like it, it really was a question of logistics. One of them would have to do something if they wanted to be together, otherwise they’d have to build some kind of pool/river system in the castle. But we criticize her for making that compromise (and fulfilling a dream of hers in the process). Then in the second movie we have a woman who is selfless and compassionate, and a man who recognizes that and wants to change his selfish ways and become a better person for her because he loves her, and we STILL FEEL THE NEED TO CRITICIZE THE WOMAN! Why don’t we criticize the Beast the same way we criticize Ariel?

Because the Beast’s change is seen as a positive one because he did it for a woman, and because Ariel’s change is seen as a negative one because she did it for a man.

Double standards are alive and well, people. Even in something as simple as how you react to a children’s movie. And even if they are geared towards empowering women by saying that she shouldn't have to change for a man to love her, it's still a double standard if you say that it's ok for a man to change for a woman to love him.

Friday, August 30, 2013

Sorry for the venting, but here goes...

So remember that awesome job that back in February I was so excited to have? Yeah, well... not so much anymore.

Back when I first started, I had heard nothing but complaints from pretty much everyone that worked there. Everyone would grumble and groan whenever they were asked to do something, they would stand around and talk about how horrible our bosses were to them. And back then, I didn't see where it was coming from. Everything seemed fine. Sure, the day could get a little hectic at times, but hey, that's any office, right? I heard that there had been five people in my position in the last two years, not including the person doing it before me, who had the responsibilities of my job tacked onto her actual job. But I didn't know why. It just seemed like maybe people gave up too fast. Now looking back on that time, it seems like they were taking it easy on me, getting me sucked in to the system before they started showing their true colors. Since then, I've become just like everyone else in the office. I grumble and groan, I cry in corners, I come home drained every day, I dread going to work every day, and I've just become a zombie. And why have I become this way? I'll tell you.


Wednesday, February 13, 2013

My Last Day

I am currently one hour away from no longer being a YMCA employee.

The past three weeks, having to get up and be out of the house by 5 am, working at the Y, then working at QDx, then going to Miracle Worker rehearsals and not getting home until 10:30 or 11 pm have been absolutely grueling. But I think these past three mornings have been the hardest. Somehow, knowing it was my last week here made it even more tempting to stay in bed (I mean, what could they do if I didn't show up? Fire me?). But it is such a wonderful feeling to know that I have a regular schedule, and to know that I never have to work another weekend shift or have to give up going out with friends because I have to get up early the next day ever again!

I will miss my boss and my supervisor at the Y, because they really are great. I'll also miss the people I work with. And I'll really miss the free gym membership. What I really won't miss (aside from the early mornings and the weekends) are the members (with a few exceptions). These people here just have this huge sense of entitlement. They're never satisfied.

On Monday, we opened up the probably million dollar expansion to the Y that has been in construction for over a year, and all people can do is complain about it. It has a new weight room with brand new equipment, a room for the spin classes with new bikes and a new stereo and speaker system, and some new offices and such. So now that all of the weights are moved out into this new room, the room that had everything in it before is now all cardio, so there was more room to add new machines. And we accomplished all of this by only increasing the prices of two or three membership categories by no more than $2 a month. But this still isn't good enough for some people.

Apparently, some people were under the impression that they were getting a second set of locker rooms and a second pool in the expansion. Also, the people who regularly take the spin classes are used to it being in one of the multipurpose rooms, where they have to move the bikes out from the wall to set up for the class and then put the bikes back when the class is done. Now that we have a cycling room they don't have to do that anymore, but they're complaining that the room is too small (because its not the size of a basketball court like the multipurpose room is). They're also pissed off because now that the room is smaller, they can't chit-chat during the classes, because now everyone in the room, including the instructor can hear them. One man actually came up to me and told me that since the middle of January (when we changed our opening time from 5 am to 5:30 am), all we had accomplished was pissing people off, and that we were going to lose hundreds of memberships.

Seriously, all these people do is complain. I'm so glad that I am leaving now, because it's gotten to the point where if I had to be here any longer, I would get fired for telling people where they can shove their complaints.

Monday, February 4, 2013

But Wait, What About Acting?

For now, I have decided several things about being a professional actress:
  1. It's a lot different as an adult than as a kid
    • When Mom and Dad aren't footing the bills for travel to and from the city, it gets really expensive really fast.
    • When I was a kid, the money I got from booking jobs was put towards my car and clothes and college stuff. I didn't need it. As an adult, I was depending on booking those jobs for any source of income.
  2. It is very hard to do without an agent. 
    • Getting an agent is just as hard as everyone says it is. Even agents that I already worked with as a kid.
    • You can't get an audition for TV and film without an agent.
    • Equity open calls are more often than not a huge waste of time and money.
  3. I am considered very overweight for my character type and the overall look that. The industry is mostly based on looks, not talent.
  4. Even getting an agent and booking a job doesn't mean that it will happen again. 
So, with all of that said, I was tired of constantly being broke, having to work early mornings and weekends and not being able to see my friends who worked normal schedules, spending most of my weekdays sitting around doing nothing, and not being able to do community theater shows that I really wanted to do and with people I wanted to do shows with. It just wasn't worth it, and I didn't feel the same way about it as I did when I was younger. I decided that to me, it was more important for AJ and I to be able to live comfortably, and for acting to go back to being something that I enjoyed doing (and got to do at all).

Since December I've been in rehearsals for The Miracle Worker (we open this Friday) and then I'm starting rehearsals this month for Olympus on my Mind, which I'm not only doing with AJ, but with a cast that includes some of our best friends.  And because I'm not just sitting around bored all day and eating, I've lost weight. And people have noticed. With the prospect of a career and steady, decent paychecks, thinking about the future isn't stressful. Things like having a wedding and buying a house and having kids don't seem so unrealistic.

And these past few months, I've been happy. Unbelievably happy. That's how I know I've made the right decision; I haven't once regretted it. 

My First Grown-Up Job

It's official. I have joined the Monday through Friday 9 to 5 working world.

After months of looking and the help of a staffing agency, I have a job working as the administrative assistant to the director of operations at a pathology lab. Today starts my third week here (my first as an official employee and not a temp), and I really like it. It is a little nerve wracking sometimes, because I'm still very new at this and don't always know what I'm doing or how to do it, but my boss is really great. Her boss can be a bit of a jerk, but I think he's warming up to me. I love having my own desk. I know where everything is, it's all organized the way I want it to be, and I even have pictures of me and AJ on it.

The lab is very busy, and it can get a little overwhelming at times. But then there are days like today, where my boss is traveling and I have no projects of my own to work on, so I'm really only here to take messages for her and distribute the mail. So I guess those days even out the crazy ones. The first two weeks were a lot of back and forth days of "I really love this job! This is going to be great!" and "Oh my God I don't think I can handle this. Maybe this is too much for my first job. Maybe I should start in a less intense office setting." But, I'm trying really hard to just remind myself that I was this nervous when I started working at the Y and didn't know what I was doing too. I also try to keep reminding myself that when she hired me, my boss said that she really wanted to hire someone to start out as her assistant and then eventually train them to be the associate director of operations, and then maybe even take over for her. So this is not just a job. This could be a career and a future.

So, I'll just keep taking deep breaths, and see what the future has in store for me here!